A lean figure, dark skin, plus the regular facial features with wide glabellas and prominent brows, Gyatso is an image of an ordinary nomad living in northern Tibet. It is really hard to link him with a "self-immolator".

Born in Qinghai Province in northwest China, Gyatso, whose secular name is Rigzin, had never thought that he had embarked on a path with no return since he left home at the age of 19 and became a monk in Tsangar Monastery, in Tongde County, Hainan Tibetan Autonomous Prefecture of Qinghai Province.

Since then, he has always dreamed to be a respectable monk through hard work.

The 12 years spent in Tsangar Monastery was the happiest time in Gyatso’s life.

But life changed suddenly when Gyatso received letters from his fellow villagers or monk friends who have been to India before.

In these letters they always boasted what a wonderful life they were living in India, the most important of which was they could "learn a lot of things and enhance the degree!”

With the dream of "being a learned and respectable monk"，Gyatso finally sneaked to the so-called "Big World"- Dharamshala, a small hill station in Himachal Pradesh, India, which was also the headquarters of the "Tibet government-in-exile".

Gyatso was shocked by the scene when he set his feet on the land of Dharamsala, where the modern colorful residential buildings, hotels and shops were mixed together with dirty slums and open barns.

It is not a perfect Arcadia but an abyss, where the scriptures were replaced by "works" of the Dalai Lama advocating "Tibet Independence", and fictive films inciting self-immolation instead of preaching Buddhist doctrines.

 Like many young monks who went there, Gyatso gradually lost himself by the strong impact of the "brainwashed propaganda".

Although in the view of Gyatso, the only reason he came to Dharamsala was to learn Buddhism, and hearing too much emphasis like how the "Han people invade Tibet" just made him boring.

However, such kind of talks, which many foreign journalists also attended, almost happened every day.

Not long after Gyatso arrived in India had he become a monk in a local monastery. However, he had a strange feeling that he was always being watched.

Once，Gyatso wanted to take a photo with his friends near the garden of the "Reception Office of the Tibetan government- in- exile in India". As soon as they posed，they were immediately stopped and by a man, who came out of the "Reception Office” with a suspicious eye.

One day, Gyatso saw someone handing out leaflets, on which read a “Tibet independence” hunger-strike would be launched in January, 2000 in Delhi, and anyone interested could attend it after writing a “pledge”.

Then, a lot of monks in the monastery wanted to go to Delhi and saw the “big world” for free. So they all followed suit and wrote the “pledge”, and Gyatso was no exception.

At that time, “hunger-strike” was a new word to Gyatso, who learned it from a master of the sutra later that a hunger-strike meant to protest without eating anything so as to express their determined attitudes.

One master of the sutra lived longer in India disagreed that Gyatso joined the strike, but he was reluctant to tell Gyatso the reason. The young Gyatso, who was then in the rebellious period of his adolescence, finally set out to Delhi after quarrelling with the master.

After arriving in Delhi, Gyatso was received by a man named Lhamo Ja, who escaped to India for some illegal behaviors.

Lhamo Ja used to be a teacher in a judicial school in northwest China’s Qinghai Province.

In 1993, he was involved into a criminal case and escaped to India. Later he became a member of the Dalai clique, and engaged in ethnic separatist activities.

The “hunger-strike” office was in a two-story building with six rooms in a local school. Gyatso had never thought that he was the only participant as he had thought there would be many people enrolled.

After completing a form and receiving a tent and carpet provided by the “hunger-strike” organizer，Gyatso was arranged to participate in the seventy-two-hour hunger strike.

In Gyatso’s memory, he had attended a total of three hunger-strikes, only the first time was voluntary. The so called “voluntary” meant no rewards.

Soon after the first hunger-strike, Lhamo Ja rushed to find Gyatso and told him that he should fill in for the second hunger-strike as there weren’t enough people to attend. Afterwards, Gyatso got 500 cordoba, Nebalese currency. The third time, the same thing happened as the second.

Then, Gyatso got to know that most of the hunger strikers were paid.

Then, Gyatso already clearly knew that the hunger-strike activities were held as a kind of acting showed to the outsiders. Therefore, they were paid and allowed to eat.

In Gyatso’s mind, such an activity was completely a kind of cheating. However, he didn’t refuse the assignment as it was a gravy train for him.

It is these three hunger strikes that made Gyatso enter the vision of the “Sanqu Federation, an organization which has launched many “Tibet independence” activities, and became a “prey” which they had been looking for a long time without any results.

And then a member of the organization started to incite Gyatso to commit self-immolation.

In order to persuade Gyatso, Lhamo Ja also held a special meeting, calling upon many members of the “Sanqu Federation” to join in.

Lhamo Ja said to Gyatso “If you really lose your life, the “Gaxag government”, the Dalai Lama and all the Tibetan people will be proud of you! There is nothing to regret if you have made up your mind as this is a glorious thing. And I will make the specific plan for you.”

At that time, Gyatso had a very bad impression on the Han people and the Chinese central government as he had been brainwashed by countless propaganda videos and books advocating “Tibet independence” written by the Dalai Lama. Plus with the instigation of Lhamo Ja in front of many people, Gyatso was agitated, so he decided to sacrifice himself for the “Tibetan cause”.

Before self-immolation, hamo Ja and other people recorded a video of Gyatso, which would be sent to and played in the United Nations.

However, Gyatso, the to-be self-immolator even had no idea about what the United Nations was, and only knew it was an “organization with great power”.

In Gyoso’s memory, he was brought into an office to record a video, during recording he was required to read off a declaration, which made four requests including asking the Chinese government to release the “political prisoners”.

After finishing recording the video, Gyaso was arranged to live in a guesthouse with good living conditions for free and waited for orders.

However, on March 10, Gyaso was suddenly informed by a member of the “Federation” that the self-immolation was canceled because there were too many Indian policemen on the street，which would possibly stop the self-immolation.

Thus, self-immolation was delayed until late March, when an Indian human rights meeting was to be held. Before committing self-immolation on March 25, Gyaso had been arranged to make a field test on the very spot.

Before the spot exercise, Gyaso had no idea about the types of gasoline. Lhamo Ja had drawn up several schemes for him and explicated the specific details, such as what to wear, where to put gasoline and how to set fire. In a word, they had racked their brains for the success of the self-immolation

Gyaso was shocked by their detailed schemes, as it seemed to him that they were not discussing self-immolation, but an ordinary thing, and what they were going to burn was not a human body, but pieces of old clothes.

But, Gyaso knew that he had embarked on a path of no turning back and it was too late to regret for he would receive retaliation if he gave up.

Therefore, his worry mounted as March 25 was approaching. Then he received a message that the self-immolation was delayed again as an American leader was to visit India.

Lhamo Ja said: “we decided to cancel the self-immolation as the United States had given us great support, and we should not bring any trouble to them. But I can assure you that you still have opportunity to contribute to the "Tibetan independence" cause. Please wait for my further information for a bigger plan”.

A few days after the two failed self-immolation plans, Lhamo Ja found Gyatso again, and told him that he had brought a good news, saying he had received an instruction from Ala Jigme, a senior official from the “Dusum Legong” (or the Security Department of the "Tibetan government-in-exile"), that Gyatso would be sent to Tibet to commit self-immolation so as to create a “bigger” influence.

One night, Gyatso was received by “Dusum Legong”Kalon , a senior officer of the Security Department of the “Tibetan government-in-exile”.

It was the first time for Gyatso to meet such an “important person” since he had been in India.

At that time, Gyatso had a complicated feeling as he finally met somebody thus he was determined to sacrifice for the six million Tibetan people.

The officer, named Kalon Pema told Gyatso “you are chosen to conduct the self-immolation in Lhasa, a place under control of the Chinese Central Government. Then the Chinese government will explain that you are fighting for the cause of "Tibet independence". In this way we can get the universal attention and support of the international community, and you yourself can also become a hero admired by the Tibetan people.”

Kalon Pema told Gyatso that his family members or friends who sent his self-immolation videotapes or pictures to India could get preferential treatment and could be sent to abroad for further study.

In Nepal, Gyatso was given 400,000 Cordoba (about 8,040 $) to steal back to Tibet with another man named Thubten, who was also appointed by the“Dusum Legong” and asked to shoot the scene when Gyatso committed self-immolation.

However，despite all these “careful preparations”, Gyatso and his allies were arrested before they arrived in Lhasa.

It is worth notice that after the self-immolation incident came to light, the "Tibetan government-in-exile", the inciter immediately published an article by the "government spokesman" on their "official website "to clarify the "truth". It immediately denied having incited the incident and indicated sending people to self-immolate in Tibet went against the Buddhist doctrine.

From the time he stole into India till now, it seems that Gyatso had a nightmare. Fortunately, he is still alive.

Now, the self-immolation on the Jokhang Temple Square in Lhasa, the most unforgettable thing for Gyatso, is still the last thing he wants to mention.

“Every time I think of the self-immolation scene, I always feel my heart is burning, like my body is all enveloped in flames except my head. I was suffering a painful struggle in the conflagration and I could neither live nor die,” said Gyatso.

At present, Gyatso said that his biggest wish was to live a new life after being released as early as possible.